Here I am stuck in a small grey box all the time. People come, they wiggle their fingers at me, they leave. Then some lady takes me to some place bigger with infinitely more interesting smells. Admittedly, this part is nice, I have more room, and I get to see the lady alot. But she does carry me up stairs every night. And she leaves me outside all the time.

She makes me poop and pee outside too; controlling much?

Then, after one of these eternal days outside she comes home. I'm pretty excited. Inside time is awesome time. There are lots of tiny scraps of things to put in my mouth and I can jump on people whenever I want. But then, she puts me in the box that moves and takes me back to the grey box place!!!!

Why bring me somewhere neat if you are going to just send me back. Especially if you are going to let the ladies there stab me in the neck with some microchip thingy.

I even heard something about an operation. I don't know what that is, but my lady keeps using the words "nip him in the bud."

I don't like it. Not one little bit.


(Some props are due to my youngest sister, who admittedly did the whole blogging in the voice of my animal thing first)